| P's
and Q's are Keys to
Your Image and Your Success
| *A
monthly column devoted to helping women and men be their
best and most confident in any situation.
Topics include dress, body language, attitude and etiquette.
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|
Victoria Seitz, PhD
Image Expert |
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Whoever thought that their IQ, business or technological superiority would
get them to the top have a surprise waiting for them in their professional
future. Sorry Charlie, it's the delivery that counts. Yes, etiquette. I
have found both inside and outside the workplace that people have forgotten
their P's and Q's. To emphasize the point, a friend of mine was told in
his annual evaluation that he had the know-how but was abrupt. His delivery
of knowledge was rough around the edges, which translates to, he did not
treat people with respect.
Etiquette is respect for everyday living that is not only important at home
but critical at the workplace. From the janitor to the CEO, treating people
with respect is critical to achieving your success. As an educator and seminar
speaker, I am in the people business and when I first started, I too, was
rough around the edges. It would come up on my evaluation that I had an
attitude. An attitude - me? Yes, I did and I started working on that. It
is an evolution that continues on a daily basis.
Here are some pointers that will help you to smooth out those rough edges:
- Introduce people. Simple but it is a practice that is not done. Whether
you remember the person's name or not or mispronounce it, just do it.
There are some guidelines such as present your peer at work to a client,
present a friend to your boss and so on but the most important tip is
to do it. If you can't remember their name, ask them. And if their name
is difficult to pronounce ask them for help in pronouncing it correctly.
In automobile sales, if a prospect doesn't give you their name they
won't give you their money. So try to get the name right. Your effort
will be appreciated more than you know.
- Treat everyone with respect. This means the janitor, the secretary
or administrative assistant, the mail person, the computer maintenance
person and your boss as well as his wife and family if that is the case.
No matter what color, rank, size, religion, gender, or sexual preference,
treat people the same and with respect. Avoid off-colored jokes, the
rumor mill and gossip. It will eventually come back to haunt you.
- Don't forget to say please and thank you and give credit where it
is deserved. Many times it takes more than one person to get something
done. Just because you happen to be the team captain doesn't mean you
get all the credit. Give credit where it is due.
- When going out to a meal with a client, peer or the boss at a restaurant
or at their home, practice good eating and conversation skills. For
example, put the napkin in your lap, don't talk with your mouth full,
don't eat like it's the last supper and finally, if you did the inviting
you pay. If you smoke ask first before you light up. If someone else
picks up the tab be sure to send them a thank you note or call and thank
them.
- Furthermore, regarding conversational skills, avoid "I" or
monopolizing the conversation. Be able to talk about other subjects
but refrain from being the master of everything. Speak from your experience
and your heart. If you can't say anything nice about something or someone,
don't say anything at all and listen.
- When it comes to door opening and other gentlemanly behaviors, at
the workplace it is usually the junior person that opens the door male
or female. But if someone wants to practice their gentlemanly behavior
like opening a door or helping you take off your coat, thank them.
- When it comes to alcohol at work, may I suggest that you refrain
from it altogether? If you are inviting someone you know has a drinking
problem, suggest a breakfast meeting or afternoon tea for a time to
meet. At the office party, being drunk is not cool. The office party
is not the same as the one with your friends. If you let loose it may
reflect badly on your future with the company and your career. It is
a very small world out there and people develop a reputation. Try to
keep yours a positive one.
- Practicing good etiquette with loved ones at home and your business
colleagues will take you where you want to go with positive relationships
with those you care about and in your profession. For more information
regarding etiquette check out my book Your Executive Image or books
by Amy Vanderbilt and other etiquette experts.
Victoria
Seitz, PhD is a professor of Marketing at California State University,
San Bernardino and is author of Your Executive Image, AdamsMedia,
Inc, 2000 and Power Dressing, DonJon Publishing, 1991. In addition
to teaching, Dr. Seitz was a fashion coordinator for Burdines, Florida
and in retail management for Saks Fifth Avenue, Phoenix, AZ. Clients of
Dr. Seitz have included Abbott Laboratories, Northern Telecom, Texas Instruments,
Yellow Freight Systems, Sally Beauty Company, the United States Armed
Forces, Travellife magazine, YWCA and Accountants Overload, in addition
to law firms, hotels, newspapers, universities, banks, credit unions,
national and local community and professional organizations nationwide.
To learn more about Dr. Seitz please visit her website at www.cbpa.csusb.edu/vseitz.
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